For generations, women have been forced to “take care” and “protect” our sexuality and limit our pleasure until the person with whom we decide to share it arrives.
Our "value" and "purity" have been attributed to virginity or a small tissue called the hymen. Which seems to be a barrier that prevents the passage of any penetrative act. And that by wanting or allowing it, we lose the dignified treatment and respect that we all deserve.
That is why we are going to demystify some ideas about the hymen and other ideas about the beginning of your sexual life. Here are myths and truths about female virginity:
All people have sexuality from the moment we are born until the day we die. The one that they teach us that our sexual life begins with our first vaginal penetration is to limit that we are able to feel, explore and enjoy ourselves. That is what gives us value. Do not restrict ourselves from observing, caressing, or giving us pleasure. We decide with whom to share our sexuality, and we do not lose something, but we gain our own discovery.
The hymen is an elastic membrane in the vagina. But contrary to popular belief, it is not an impenetrable barrier at vaginal entry. It can be elastic, with holes, or not exist in all women and people with a vulva. Its slight bleeding is said to be due to its rupture through penetration with fingers, sex toys, or a penis. But this bleeding does not always appear when these practices are carried out.
It may not even appear or it could have appeared at times where you had a strong blow or having ridden a bike with too much force. Be that as it may, your worth and purity are not determined by this fabric; it is one more way to limit the variability of the different bodies and exploration of women.
We believe that the vagina can be immense by the number of penetrations that have been had. But in reality, it is that it is composed of muscles that adapt to all types of penetration. The one that feels narrow can also be due to the emotions that you relate to intercourse or to the exercise of the pelvic muscles that we can perform through kegel exercises. But it is not true that it will grow immensely and that will disqualify you as a woman or a couple.
Exploring your body and seeking pleasure is something we all go through. There is this desire and curiosity that when denied or restricted can generate guilt. But you are not the only one.
Masturbating and stimulating yourself brings you closer to connecting with your body, to know your pleasures and limits. What a great act of love for yourself that you know how to enjoy!
And if it is as a couple, although many may have marriage in their life plan, it is not necessary that this enjoyment be discovered until this event. The decision to share with you and have your partner also share with you should not be punished.
Little by little, we will create spaces where it is not a mandate to save your discovery to someone else. Respect for your feelings and emotions is the most important thing.